Coping Mechanisms during lockdown.
Social Media, food, Netflix, complaining to others – they’ve all played a part during lockdown in keeping me distracted from how I’ve really been feeling…
Sitting on my couch the other day, the house was peaceful, quiet and still and I looked up from my phone and experienced a moment. I felt myself step away from my physical body and I became the observer and saw exactly what I was doing, burying my mind in social media land to avoid how I was feeling.
In that moment of observation, I felt that I had a choice. I could continue walking the path of avoidance by filling my mind and body with un-nourishing content, or I could stop and sit with my current state of emotion.
Working through our emotional layers is no easy task and I could see there was a lot sitting there. The temptation to keep hiding was strong but I could also see something behind that if I chose to dive in and walk my way through to the other side, and that was a feeling of acceptance and peace.
So, I put down my phone and instead closed my eyes and tuned in. Not just to the surface feelings that I had been looking at during my meditations, I went in deep to the place that felt very uncomfortable and within that space I found what I had been hiding from.
A myriad of emotions came to the surface around the lockdown and forced closure of our business and the impact it is having on the people around me. I could feel my whole body shut down and become anxious and could see how those debilitating emotions had been running my life for the past few months.
While I knew I had every right to be feeling the way I did – holding on to those emotions was doing more damage than the actual event that caused them had been.
So, I used my process to let go of it all. Knowing that the only way to release what we are feeling is to actually sit with it for a bit and allow it to be heard.
Our emotions are meant to come up, pass through us and release (like when we laugh at something – the feeling of happiness comes and then leaves). Its the same with sadness, frustration and anger. We make a choice to let it flow through us or to hold onto it and stay stuck and this is where the damage occurs.
When we decide that what we are feeling is too uncomfortable for us, we will seek out the things that distract us from it. Problem is that those things only work while we are doing them, and we eventually need more and more of our chosen distraction to keep us in an altered state and away from how we are truly feeling.
So, I gave myself the time and space to sit with each layer and be present with it – allowing myself to acknowledge each emotion as it rose to the surface. Even if I didn’t agree with it, I still let it be there, be heard and acknowledged. Doing this allowed each layer to release and move on, leaving me feeling much lighter, calmer and peaceful on the inside.
I am now at peace with my world and my experience of lockdown. I don’t know what the future holds, but I know I am in control of my own surroundings and I can make the best of what I do have. There is always a silver lining to everything we experience and even though it is hard to see that right now – I know it will appear very soon and I trust that I, and those around me will be better for it.
I am no longer seeking out distractions and am finding instead, that my days are flowing more, and I am filling them with things that fulfil me not drain me. Today it was going to buy a delicious chai late during my break and have a nice chat with a friend on the phone.
If you are finding it hard to make peace with your current situation, then practice being still and present with the layers of emotions around that. Close your eyes and think of the event and then pay attention to what comes up in your body. Give that feeling or sensation ALL of your focus and attention. It may be uncomfortable but be OK with that – it’s only temporary and it will move on.
Nurture the sensation and let it be heard until you feel it dissolve and release. They are simply reactions to something you experienced that you weren’t prepared to look at. Keep working through the layers until you feel peaceful and calm about the situation when you think of it. At this point you will often find a new realisation, idea, or way of thinking will come in.
I have released several f r e e meditations on You Tube to help you to work through and release what is keeping you stuck and searching for distractions and you can access them here.