Boundaries become essential when we find ourselves feeling depleted and fatigued due to excessive time and energy spent on others. They are also essential when someone’s behaviours are affecting our well-being.
Equally, they play a crucial role when others disregard our worth, exploit our time, or take advantage of our generosity.
It’s important to recognize that there’s no inherent obligation to cater to every demand from anyone.
Generosity comes from our compassion and is shown as a heartfelt gift to others. This act of giving is reserved for those who genuinely require it and in return show genuine appreciation for our kindness.
Maintaining healthy boundaries is applicable across friendships, partnerships, family, co-workers, and community members. They are vital for our personal health and well-being.
Boundaries can take different forms:
- Managing your time – Prioritize self-care before giving your time to others. Ensure your own cup full so you have plenty to share.
- Balance of Giving – If you’re not receiving assistance or care in return, adjust or reduce what you’re giving.
- Respectful Communication – Address disrespectful speech by stating, “I’m here to listen or assist, but that tone or language isn’t acceptable.”
- Saying No – Feel empowered to decline tasks you’re not comfortable with. Politely and respectfully decline social invitations for events you don’t wish to attend.
If a friend is overstepping your boundaries, contemplate distancing yourself for a while to see how it feels. Decide what you want from the relationship moving forward. If they can’t meet your needs, without passing judgement – move on.
In a romantic relationship, have a conversation addressing the issue. Be clear on how you want to be treated and communicate your expectations moving forward.
With family, remember giving isn’t obligatory. When you’re the only option, establish boundaries. Define the terms for your future involvement. If they seek your assistance or support, let them know the conditions under which you’ll provide it.
Safeguard your energy, time, and emotional well-being – it truly matters.
Establishing boundaries is a form of self-care. Just as you offer care to others, remember to extend it to yourself. It’s perfectly fine to prioritize your own well-being.
Giving should be coming from a state of joy but over-giving leaves us in a state of resentment.
It’s important to remember establishing healthy boundaries is an expression of self-love and among the most beneficial things you can do for yourself. Keep this in mind when you are setting them with others.
If you are struggling with any of these things, consider booking a 1:1 session with me. We can work together to strengthen and create healthy boundaries for you.